Sunday, August 06, 2017

Home again, after a very happy week in Strathardle.

Perdita wasn’t very impressed by “out”, at first. For one thing, it rains out there, and a cat can easily get wet. She wasn't expecting that. For the first few days, she wouldn’t venture out unless I went, too. She would sit at the open door, even with the sun shining beyond. By yesterday morning she had become a bit more venturesome, but still didn’t go far.

We’ll be going back soon, with Helen and her family. I'm sure Perdita will remember, and venture further.

We saw two plays at the Pitlochry Festival Theatre – Barrie’s “Mary Rose” and Ayckbourn’s “Absurd Person Singular”. Both very well done, both thought-provoking.

And spent a useful hour with the lawyer who is working on my husband’s executry.

Still not much knitting. I largely finished a big swatch for the Lovage sweater. LoveKnitting has made up a package with Debbie Bliss’ Donegal Fine Tweed instead of the Rowan yarn the pattern was written for. It’s clearly going to work well, gauge-wise, and it produces a very nice fabric. I didn’t find the experience of knitting it entirely blissful – the tweediness? Lack of wooden needles – they all seemed to be in action elsewhere?

I think I might go on and do a swatch in KD’s Buachaille, with Miss Rachel’s Yoke in view, to see how I like that.

All is well here except that I cannot find the document which certificates my marriage, 60 years ago. I need it to establish my right to my husband’s university pension. (The more-trusting government is paying my National Insurance pension all right, but that’s not enough to live on.) There’s only one place it could be, and it’s not there. The envelope is, but it’s empty.

I don’t know quite what to do, but I had better do it promptly. Since his death, they are paying me nothing at all.


  1. You will need to apply to your central registry for a copy of your marriage certificate. They will charge you a fee, but it's a simple process.

    1. Alas (for present purposes) -- we were married in New Jersey. I have already attempted the NJ Dept of Vital Statistics on-line, but got bogged down.

    2. Anonymous10:25 AM

      Set one of your offspring to the task - or perhaps the wonderful Archie?

      Could the certificate (or a copy) have been needed for the recent passport replacement?
      Or for the lawyer himself?

    3. Cathy suggested that, too, and it's a sensible idea -- but surely I'd remember. Googling the NJ Vital Statistics office produces an ad for an agency which will do it at considerable cost. I've emailed USS.

  2. Jean:

    Fund the relevant municipality in this list, then search within the municipality's page for "registrar" or "certified copy" or "marriage license." The city I chose as a test, Asbury Park, uses those terms and does indeed have an online request link. FYI, the legitimate government sites in the US will have a ".gov" extension -- you can ask Google to limit results to that extension, using the advanced search function.

  3. Anonymous12:22 PM

    Surely, there are others who have been in your place and accommodations have been made to accept other proof of marriage? Keep looking but have faith that something else may also be done. Chloe

  4. Anonymous1:46 PM

    Some US states out-source some of the vital record document production requests. An expedited, certified copy can cost around US$60. (I recently helped a friend now living in London but born in Massachusetts get an apostilled birth certificate.) Requesting the certificate was simple enough online, if pricy. For the apostille, I went to the Secretary of the Commonwealth’s office. It only took 10 minutes and cost US$6, but that was simplest done in person. Or so he was told. - All this to say: you can get a new copy, make sure you know which bells & whistles the university requires (certified? with apostille?), and you may need to invoke local help. It is annoying, but you shall persevere successfully, of that I have no doubt!
    (who may once have had an identity here but who comments so infrequently he has long since forgotten it…)

  5. Anonymous3:20 PM

    Jean, what is your maiden name - Your husband's first name - the date of your marriage...both birth dates - where were you married in NJ...we'll see if we can get there through quicker...glad to see you back!!! pg

    1. Anonymous4:24 PM

      PLEASE for your identity safety remove the above at once!!

    2. Dear pg,
      I got scared about identity theft and removed my details. My email address is in the sidebar -- write to that if you haven't already recorded the information. I'm grateful for your offer of help.

  6. Yes please remove those details. ASAP

  7. Anonymous8:06 PM

  8. Carol M8:56 PM

    I love that photo of Perdita. So glad you had a pleasant week.

  9. Anonymous2:08 AM

    Love that photo of Perdita, too!

    Here is the website for NJ vital records:

    You may also be able to get in touch with the town where you were married. I think I had to do that a while ago. If you need local help, I'm your woman.

    Beverly in (you guessed it!) NJ

  10. It won't be as bad as what my mother faced. The courthouse were she and my father got their marriage license burned and the local registrar had not sent the records to the state ( this was 1936) To prove that she and my father were married she had to get a notarized affidavit from one of the witnesses. fortunately it was my fathers cousin and he was still living.

  11. Oh all of these helpful comments about the marriage certificate! They are making me nervous. I think I will have to hunt mine down (or have my husband do it) to calm myself. For now, I'm just enjoying the photo of Perdita. She looks dubious about this whole country thing.