Friday, January 12, 2024

 All well. I like the new carer, and so far she has shewn no wish to leave. Helen came round and we had a jolly lunch together, all three.

  Thank you very much for your messages about my future. It sounds as if there is more variety in British retirement living than I had thought. When my husband died, I briefly considered some retirement flats in Blairgowrie — I could live in one of them in the winter, I thought, and in our dear house in Kirkmichael in the more clement months.

   Little did I anticipate how soon this crippling hip would affect me.  I have long believed that the US served better those who came in independently on their own feet and later needed care. But anyway those flats offered no communal dining room nor any other form of communal life. What I need now is constant and intimate care and whatever niceties of life may prove to be possible on top. Maybe I should push for hip replacement? Death being preferable to the status quo?

  I am sorry to be so gloomy. Knitting progresses slowly. 

   Wordle: stunningly easy today. My starters gave me three greens and two browns. I got it in three. So did everybody else today, on whichever side of the sea, except for Rachel and Ketki, who both scored two.



6 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:58 PM

    Anonymous Janet speaking - keep plugging along Jean. The right solution will become clear in time. Carry on knitting!

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  2. Anonymous8:43 PM

    I would totally go for hip replacement. As soon as possible!
    Jenny from Canada

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  3. If you can find a civilised care home with a few like-minded residents, then that has to be preferable to the uncertainties involved in arranging for carers to come in. What you have told us about your respiratory conditions suggests that the operation may be simply too risky now. My friend's aunt packed the same case she had used when setting off to be a nursemaid at the other end of the country and saw it as the next phase in her life. She had some happy years there, free of worries.

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  4. Anonymous10:29 PM

    Think again about the hip replacement.
    Marilyn, Chicago

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  5. My mom was in a very early stage of dementia when she had her second hip replaced at the age of 85. She suffered from a-fib and some congestive heart failure. She got through it and had a couple of pain-free years where she was able to get around and live in her house before we had to move her to a senior living facility where she lived independently with help coming in a couple of times a day. Eventually she succumbed to a stroke but she did have two pain free years after that hip replacement. If they feel you will benefit from the surgery and will do it I think you should definitely consider it. Even if you had someone there to help you wouldn’t be wheelchair bound and would be able to get up and down the outside steps occasionally. I personally feel that’s the most limiting thing for you, not being able to get out. I’ve been to your house and know what your steps are like, with the hip replacement and some help I think you would be able to negotiate them.

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  6. Anonymous10:39 AM

    That's an interesting question, about balancing potential risks of surgery against potential benefits in pain relief and possible increased mobility. But is increased mobility a real option, given that you have not been able to walk for some months now? Whatever the original issue was, there is sure to be significant muscle weakness after this period in a wheelchair. I would be asking the surgeons how confident they were that you would be able to regain some mobility?

    Also, is it not the case that the anaesthetists were not prepared to risk the procedure for you? In my experience they have the deciding vote on these issues, regardless of what a surgeon is prepared to do.....which might render this whole discussion academic. Fingers crossed for you.

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